A Change in Pace

So I have decided to make a change in pace in this life. I have come to the conclusion that while everyone else is living everyday to the fullest they can, I am standing still. I am willing and able to go out and grab life by the horns, the problem is that I have stood here for so long that I no longer know which foot to start with and in which direction I should go. I have been to school, received a diploma, graduated Alpha Beta Kappa, and raised 3 awesome kids. Now that I able to do me, I feel lost. I have a wide range of skills I can use, I just cant remember which ones I could use to benefit my life to the fullest. Some of my favorite times was when I was in my teenage years and didn't have to worry about the consequences. Now that I am married and have kids I feel I need to play it safe, but I think I am playing a little too safe. I need to remove the padding and helmet and face what is left of this life head on. What brought me to this decision you ask, well I have recently had to support a close friend whose brother passed away from stage 4 cancer. He was only 33. I hate to say I am the cliche and that having to go through this opened my eyes, but it really did. I just hope it is not to late to realize my potential in what I can accomplish and go out and do it. I am starting a new life with the new year and Damn It I am going to do it right this time. No more excuses, no more reasons, just do as I need and do as I want and to hell with anyone else who disagrees.

For Those Who Have Lost

I regret the fact you went away

I regret the time we didn’t have

I regret the laughs we missed each day

I regret the fact that you went away.

I regret I can hold you no more

I regret I cant sing you a song

I regret not looking in your eyes

I regret the overbearing good – bye

I don’t regret the time we had

I don’t regret the laughs we shared

I don’t regret the funny things you said

I don’t regret holding you while you lie in bed

I hate the fact you left

I hate the fact you had pain

I hate the fact you suffered

However there will be a day I see you again.